10 reasons why clients should have their nephew design their website
1. He has Photoshop, Dude.
Their nephew has a hacked version of Photoshop 7 that he pulled off of The Pirate Bay. That’s as good as any up to date design program you have, I assure you. He also is amazing at making reflections and stuff in there so, you’re already a step behind.
2. He’s Cheaper and/or Free
Let’s face it, good design costs money. When the clients nephew works for pizza or just a family favor his cost is already way less than you can conceive. He has no overhead because this is just a hobby. It’s also important to note that his quality will be better because he “knows”.
3. He provides unlimited revisions
That’s pretty self explanatory, you can’t even compete with that.
4. He has a longer client relationship than you’ll ever have
Their nephew has known them since he was born and well, you just met them. So, don’t take it to hard when you realize that they already have a lifetime of first hand experience with the client. The client saw their first steps. What did you see? Their poorly designed website and inquired about the re-design?
5. He will be praised at Christmas dinner (Where you won’t be)
What better time to haggle and praise him than at Christmas. His parents will be so proud that he is still working on this amazing site that they’ll brag about him to all the family. Heck, even the client will be there. You can’t offer this kind of service so, just hang it up already.
6. He’ll make the logo…well, bigger
He knows everything about the web already. He knows that a logo is better when it’s the biggest possible thing on the screen. Plus, he’s not afraid to make it bigger than you’re ever willing to make it.
7. He has Photoshop, Remember?
Again, Photoshop. He has it.
8. He practically created the interwebs
He’s had all kinds of classes in school like intro to keyboarding. He was basically around when Al Gore created the internet so, he knows all the tricks. He doesn’t even bother with SEO because capital letters are “teh suck“.
9.This Technically accurate list post says so
Because we know, that you know, we know. Ya know?
10. He has a Myspace account
Myspace is social media at its finest. He doesn’t have a twitter account or a website or waste time on analytics. He just puts up on myspace that he is a designer and viola. He is. Because out of all his 62 creepy old guy Myspace friends they’ll give him more traffic than you ever could through campaigns or any other well designed campaign launch.
Chad Engle is currently slaying pixels @BoomtownROI. He abides in coastal Charleston, SC and enjoys living on an island. You should follow, harass or chat to him on twitter @chadengle and @fuelcreativity .
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You guys are missing the point. When a client wants to use his nephew, that is a good thing. You just saved yourself months of hassle and headache. If a client doesn’t understand your value, RUN FOR THE HILLS!
Clark, you’re so right! I will definitely do that next time a client suggests that.
The worse client I had thought her 10 year old son could design her site!
Months of misery :( and low pay
Funny article.
Nice post Chad and incredible images! I also would have opted for animated gifs and would have added some music for the finishing touch. ;)
Recognizing when clients are going to be “clients from hell” is tough to do… and harder when they wave a check in your face. Kudos to those designers that can skip the headaches.
yep I would have gone for the music option too – midi music.
“..I also would have opted for animated gifs…”
Especially the kind that glitter!
love this article it is very funny.
Nice one. Maybe you should have mentioned Geocities in there but perhaps the feel of all the images is veering towards Geocities anyway.
I think you should qualify it with YNMV (your nephew may vary). Seriously I don’t think every nephew or niece could be this bad and I am sure there are some very good young web designers.
Funny. What, no blinking text?
#11 No formal training means he can be more creative because he’s not burdened by usability or coding best practices.
#12 Extensive use of Comic Sans.
Hah, classic.
So true! The images and headings say it all!
I was the nephew for the longest time. I am proud to say that most of my web designs looked like those headers!
Agree with Wes, some animated gifs and music would’ve made this ‘great’!
good one : )
True!…
I hate nephews! :)
LOL that sure is a funny picture. Thx for sharing it! =)
So true about PS. Good post!
This happened to me just today, hahaha. Damn it.
:) really enjoyable post, and it actually tells the truth. Damn those nephews!
Funny and interesting article. Very enjoyable reading this post. Great article!
Classic!! :)
Hilarious article, and a bit sad if you’ve met clients with such a “creative” family member (ugh)
I disagree with #1 though, kids these days have the latest pirated software installed, and that nephew probably is more up to date in the software department than most pros. NOT the point i know, but.. just sayin’ :D
Wow that’s totaly true, i’ll have my next websitte done by my nephew design! LOL!!!
Oh how many times I’ve come across these excuses! Honestly there is no answer to any of them, that will keep them as a client.
I like point 3. We all know that clients hate revisions!
The ironic thing about it all is that when any freelancer started out…they were that kid (to some extent). Doing anything you can to get work (free or cheap was better than nothing). Learning about the industry from whatever means. So ironically, every designer started out as that kid, just saying.
But I do love the article.
So true…There’s one or dozen clients I have right now I’d like to send to their nephew’s…gladly
hahaha, that really funny but it was happen in my situation…
client always want free/cheaper service, so why we open the business? is it for charity…hahaha
Haha, very nice list :D
LOVE the images. Brilliant!
Unfortunately, I was the nephew old drunken Uncle “Touchy” always cornered to do a logo for his bi-annual new business. I had to fake my own death to escape further requests.
lol But, what if you’re the nephew?… hahaha :)
Funny… I often come up against ‘nephews’ in projects. “Go with them if you like” I say, “but here’s my number for when it doesn’t work out”
:)
Poor baby! We feel your pain.
Hopefully, even with a relative you set up a contract. Really is a must. You can remind your relative that although you’ve been gracious enough to extend her a reduced rate, this takes you away from working on other full-priced client work. So she really MUST understand that you’ll need to wrap it up or bill for the additional hours.
You can always take a little passive-aggressive revenge next time it’s your turn to bring a dish for the holidays. ;-)
Good list. But this one is a little better.
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/design_hell
Hello dude,i likes Your New blog ideal a lot. attain u have on suggestion for my website? thanks being Your New attention
Number 11 he is dedicated and mostly will not have other clients
Too funny and sometimes so sadly true.
haha…tats cute..reminds me of my nephew
Now I just have to teach my nephew how to use photoshop and code HTML. Now were talkin’
Oh this is so funny, the best is when the “nephew” is invited in to meetings because “he’s a web designer”
:) funny article. Unfortunately, I am a nephew and have designed a web for my uncle… And how many times I’ve come across these excuses! I really dont remember of this question. mostly so sadly true
“He was basically around when Al Gore created the internet.” That just kills me! LOL.
I’m with Clark though. This client’s better off with his nephew.
There is lots of differing ideas on design and style that it’s difficult to please anyone sadly…
This is sooo funny, and sadly true sometimes. Except it isnt just nephews,it is sisters, brothers…. yeah you get it. It seems the younger you are the more you know about PS and the web. What else are you supposed to do in your free time? homework?
so true, theres a video on youtube which explains this lovely http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VfprIxNfCjk
Interesting how you assume any teenager with an aunt or uncle is incapable of good web design. I’m only 17; and designed a website for my aunt’s business – do I automatically suck? Fluency in jQuery, PHP, Actionscript, CSS and (x)HTML is all that a good web designer/developer needs. Age is irrelevant.
Shane the fact that you think some skills in a few languages is all that’s need to be a developer just proves that the article is right. At 17 you should still be in school, learn some business skills, a bit of company law, tax law, ethics. Come back in 10 years, after you’ve encountered all the above and worse, and you’ll be writing articles about why 5 year olds shouldn’t code.
Hey Shane
I have to agree with Feroze. I started my first web design job when I was 14 and learned many languages: AS1 at the time, PHP, PERL, HTML, JS, DHTML, etc. I was in huge competition with other devs because I charged less. I didn’t know my worth BUT there was ton that I didn’t know — like why older devs were angry at me for charging less.
Sadly knowing the skill doesn’t make you a successful developer. It’s been over 10 years now for me and there’s a ton that I didn’t know about business, about running a company, networking, cost of living, negotiation, budgets, taxes, protecting myself, working with other agencies, etc. How much to charge new hires and not do all the work myself etc.
I met a woman on a freelance assignment who told me that her 10 year old son could do my job… I asked her to please have him do it, and took it as a loss. The cost of her project went up significantly because she had to hire another agency to finish her site.
In 10 years you will definitely notice a huge different between what you know now and then. There’s a huge difference between making something work and the overhead.
I never claimed that in my short period on this earth I has mastered every aspect of running a business. I am fully aware that I have a long way to go in that respect. This article made the generic statement that teenagers cannot produce good design – a statement that is false. Had the article stated “10 year olds cannot run business because they lack experience in rudimentary business management” I would agree with you fully.
As for “should still be in school;” I’d just like to add that I graduated Monday this week (with Dux). Currently I am waiting on results so that I can select a university course next year.
Lastly, you both operate under the assumption that I aspire to work in the web dev/design industry. Contrarily, I intend to get a Law/Computer Science double degree.
Hey man Congrats on your degree choices and graduation!
Unfortunately from your answer you just supported the article.
Well Shane, if you post on a designer forum about your developer skills should we assume you want to be a lawyer with a computer science degree. But read the article again, having a few skills and one site in your portfolio amounts to absolutely nothing. What the article is trying to say is that we as professional designers keep encountering clients who have friends and family who’ll design for free but their skill levels don’t compare to ours, but they expect us to provide our level of service at the same price as their nephews.
Valid point. The point I was trying to reiterate however; is that an individuals skills should not be automatically discounted because of age. While in 99% of cases, you are probably correct – you should still accept that few very talented (if I may toot my own horn just a little longer) designers exist that do have an age appended with “teen.”
Shane, if you were being charged with murder, who would you hire to defend you, some kid fresh out of varsity or some old coot who’s been playing golf with the judge for 20 years.
“you should still accept that few very talented (if I may toot my own horn just a little longer) designers exist that do have an age appended with “teen.”
All that says to me is that you want a little pat on the head…OK then if it will help you sleep at night” Good Boy Shane, you designed one little site for your aunty, I’m sure it ranks well versus the 243 million sites out there. Wow, you got gold at the special olympics!
Sorry Shane, if the site you’re currently linking to is your design “portfolio” it really doesn’t show that you’re a strong designer. So, please do not “toot” your own horn.
It also shows that you weren’t the one who coded it. However, I will give you kudos to simply having presence up and the ability to understand logically how this entire web thing may operate.
I’ll not be like Feroze to give you a pat on the head, but certainly come back in 10 years and show what you’ve learned.
“This article made the generic statement that teenagers cannot produce good design”,
Actually,
I never stated an age in the entire post. I said “nephew”. You drew your own conclusion on age. The point of the article is that there are many self-proclaimed “designers” in the world. Even other industries have self proclaimed “guru’s”.
The reason most things are discounted with age is because regardless of how much you learn “by the book” you can’t learn experience you get that through years of practice.
Well said, and oh so true!
Blake
Great article (and comments).
But the nephew doesn’t use animated GIFs. That’s old hat.
He uses Flash because “everybody has it” and it looks really pretty. And lots of high resolution JPEGs because “everybody has a fast internet connection now”.
And if you mention CSS or SEO you get a blank stare.
I’m not a real designer, I just can’t afford to hire one.:-)
Oh lovely.. Funny article but very creatively written :D
Creativity does not end,Innovative make success!
I imagine the design you create and want to be like you.
Can you teach me in terms of design?
By coincidence I arrived here just after I looked at a site I quoted for but was told “my son can do that”. It has 9 page downs to get to the bottom, 3 x 10Mb photos, several illegal images (allegedly) and of course it’s got a scrolling Marquee!
I may not be the best designer in the world but… oh my word…
Bob